How many times did you touch yourself? 

Do you get sexual urges? 

Where did he put his hands? 

Did you get an erection when you were with her?

Did you have an orgasm? 

Was it just missionary position? 

Did you have oral sex? 

What thoughts did you have during masturbation? 

Do you know what masturbation is? 

Oh, wait... I got more...

Masturbation is a violation of your body. 

You shouldn't make out until you're engaged. 

Control your desires. 

You must refrain from taking the sacrament, because the two of you were grinding. 

Sexual sin is second to murder. 

If you're Mormon, or were Mormon, or know anything about Mormons, these questions shouldn't come as a surprised to you. You know that they are asked of children and teenagers by men in private interviews. I'd like to guess that regardless of the lack of surprise, they trigger some discomfort within you.

Maybe shock?

Maybe... rage?


I wanna write about something that seems less obvious to everyone, especially the invested subscribers of this organization, those True Blue, Totally Believing Mormons:

The Mormon (M-O-R-M-O-N) church doesn't want you questioning them.

Independent thought within this institution is unacceptable.

If you have the balls to vocalize your independent thought publicly which in turn compels other members to say, 'Hey, I agree', you're expelled, unchurched- all those afterlife eternal goals and promises you'd spent your life accumulating are NULL and VOID.

You dare to say you don't agree with something, become a voice for those who haven't found theirs, you are spiritually dead to the church that is supposedly headed by the most perfect, pure, and unconditionally loving human to ever walk the earth the end goodbye.

I think women should have the same RIGHTS, PRIVILEGES, and POWER as men = Don't Let the Door Hit You On the Way Out!

I think the Mormon church should accept the gay community and allow them to marry each other even in the temple! = Make Like a Tree and Get Out of Here.

I think male Mormon leaders need to stop asking minors sexually explicit questions behind closed doors OR with a parent present! = Fuuuuuuuuck Youuuuuuuuuu

Which brings us back to the questions and statements at the top of this post which are real and are asked on the regular.

Today, a man named Sam Young was excommunicated from the Mormon church, because of his activism and advocacy for minors who are and have been asked questions like the ones above. It's been a long time practice of the church, because sexual purity is part of worthiness to enter into the highest level of heaven (yes, they have levels) where God lives.

{Your titties get touched, God don't want you. Some dude grinds his levi-sheathed hard-on against your fully clothed groin, Jesus don't want you. You gotta confess that shit and get clean, cuz you dirty.}

Sam wanted to leave on November 5, 2015 when that fateful policy was revealed ala Facebook. For all intents and purposes, he was done. On November 6, 2015, he withdrew his withdrawal, because his wife, who he'd made those LDS promises to and with, wasn't okay.

And now... all Sam wanted to do was spark awareness of the damage being done behind closed doors, sway the old men runnin' this fawnky shit to knock it off. And no one is surprised that they were like "Naw, bro." And they've taken everything (and for a Mormon, your temple marriage and all of its appendages are everything) away from him and his wife.

Sam's excommunication is nothing ~NOTHING~ short of The Church (pronounced in high British) exclaiming that they are right and correct in asking 12 year old girls about their tits and 12 year old boys about how often they jizz in the shower and you are an apostate to try and stop us.

Someone on Facebook today put it so perfectly that I'm going to simply copy and paste here:

I'm not sure if there has ever been a decision that more pointedly illustrated that loyalty to the institution is the most prized possession, everything else be damned. Even when the policy is easily changed, even when it's clearly problematic and dangerous-- not only for the children but for the institution itself-- they will absolutely not budge if the advocacy comes from below. 

My Mormon family and friends,

You are in a cult.



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