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The White Man

Let's leave this ambiguous.

Also, I'm not gonna tell you about experiences that took place with just one white man. For this, I'll make it one lumpy conceptual White Cisgender Heterosexual Conservative Male (cue the music from the 'Beef-It's What's For Dinner!' music).

In the work force, I have to deal with him. I have to play the game of diplomacy without compromising who I am. If it's mental gymnastics, it's the balance beam in heels with someone patting me on the head saying, "Gosh, I just don't know how you do that! I never could do that! But here are some pointers! Hey! Why did you do it like that?? Why aren't you listening?"

...but I just keep doing my thing.

Utah is the type of prime real estate, and certainly not the most prime, where this guy is King. Everything around him is his dominion. He is not a part of a group that is marginalized. For those of you who do not understand what I mean, I'll present you with the extreme opposite, but keep in mind, won't you, that just one of the following, ONE, puts this example person in a marginalized group:  a 1)homosexual 2)transgender 3)female of 4)color.

Like I said, just being gay or just a person of color is enough for one who lives in this hemisphere of Earth to realize that they don't get to navigate through society with the ease of the Conceptual WCHCM (see above). Which brings me to one of the humdingers I heard recently from this King, in his most didactic tone:

I do not buy into the Black Lives Matter crap. Look around... are there slaves? Do we still have slavery? No, we don't! All of the problems that black people complain about are self-inflicted. 

All the while, his index finger pointing.

I turned heel and speed-walked away. He was still talking.

So... I have a vagina. And I'm very liberal. That doesn't mean I hate Jesus. And that also doesn't mean (grab onto the nearest stable structure) that I hate men. You know what it does mean? I get preached at. I get schooled. The King instinctively needs to teach me. We could be talking about Christmas wrapping paper quality, and he'll assume the same lordly sermonizing that he will about abortion.

And why wouldn't he? When is he ever challenged, except by other WCHCM's? Therefore, the King gets to also say things like this:

You know, every time I hear 'Sexual Assault' these days, I automatically think, "Oh, she was raped." But then I hear what she claims happened to her, and I'm like "Oh, grow a back bone! Seriously? Shake it off!" 

And on another day, the King, in a somber tone, lamented how all these men being accused and losing their jobs are being punished without any evidence. Speaking to me as if I'm 5: In our judicial system, it's 'innocent until proven guilty', but not in the media...

What a world this must be like to live in. Nothing is your fault. You know everything. And you never experience the anxiety or fear of an existence of inferiority or, worse, a scourge.

Is it their fault? The WCHCM... the King of this society...? I mean... okay, on the one hand, this has been going on since forever. On the other... there are WCHCM who are awake, and I don't mean Matt Damon.

And there's only so much you can call out in a professional setting, in the workplace. Being mistreated? Call the shit out. Other co-workers being mistreated? Call that shit out. Offensive name calling being used toward anyone present or not? Call it. The rest... walk that balance beam. And here the post comes full-circus -yeah, circus. I fucking meant to say circus.

How often have I, a single working parent avec vagina, had a WCHCM teach at me? And you know how the next part goes... if you're not 100% conciliatory, you're usually-


I play the game well. I can balance on that beam. Do I pat myself on the back for that?



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