I Will Throw the Book at You

A for Effort

Matt and I were out having lunch a few years ago, and I said, "I have an idea for a book!"

Then Matt gets the look on his face that he gets when I know he's bracing for something that could be possibly, um, painful.

"Okay...?"  said Matt.

"K, here it is:  My Life as a Mormon (P.S. And I Do Not Have Pioneer Heritage-GASP!)"

I eagerly expected Matt to give me his half smile and say, "Right on, Ash.  Right on."

But instead, he immediately replies by putting his hands over his entire face and saying, "Oh my gosh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no."

"Matt! I think it's awesome!"

"Ash...how do I put this.  I get that you're trying to be funny, but I don't think anyone else would."

Then a little while after that, I had another idea for a book.  I'd had a cleaning job at the district courthouse for several months at this time.  During the time I was employed there, I certified as a CASA Volunteer (which requires being sworn-in in the Juvenile courtroom), got divorced (requires an appearance in the big person courtroom), and got subpoenaed for jury duty.

"Matt, can you believe how much I have been involved with the court system??  It's crazy that I've never had to go to court until I started cleaning one."

"You should write a book!"  Matt said.

"Oooo, yeah, and I'll call it (clear throat) My Life at the Court."  I said.

Then Matt added for a subtitle, "(And By The Way, I Was Married to a Homosexual)."

I guffawed.

Brilliant man.  

For Realsies 

It's time to write a book.


  1. Go for it. :)
    Jury service is horrible (at least mine was) such a mind fuck.

  2. Especially jury duty in CC. Mindless waste of time...

  3. I think you should write a book. So many of us have interesting and inspiring stories that could help others. I am friends with a lesbian couple that has been together for 3 years. They are 63 years old and both just finally walked away from their husbands after 30 years of marriage. So many interesting stories to be told. Do it!


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